Monday, May 15, 2006

Gentlemen Don't

A small boy stands in front of me, gazing up earnestly, fingers working the corduroy of his pants. "Mary? Mary, there's a--" I interrupt. "Let go of your penis. Women don't like it when men fondle their penises when they talk to them." Here at Mary's house, it's just one Important Life Lesson after another.


Blogger Peter said...

That explains all the funny looks.

5/15/2006 11:48:00 a.m.  
Blogger Mary P. said...

BWAH-hahahaha! Thanks for the belly laugh, Peter.

5/15/2006 11:55:00 a.m.  
Blogger Haley said...

As unluck would have it, I know one fellow who could use a lesson like this...someone to gently inform him that readjusting his nether regions is something best done in private - especially if he is going to reach into his pants to do so. Eugh.

5/15/2006 03:12:00 p.m.  
Blogger Jenorama said...


I would say that there are some circumstances under which women *do* like it, but it would not be appropriate to share that with that small boy...

5/15/2006 03:45:00 p.m.  
Blogger Granny said...

So did he? Let go of his penis? For how long?

5/15/2006 03:59:00 p.m.  
Blogger kimmyk said...


How sweet. I wish I could have been at his house that night when his momma asked him "So what did you learn at Miss Mary P's house today?"

heh heh!

5/15/2006 06:53:00 p.m.  
Blogger Andie D. said...

Better learned late than never! Too funny!

5/15/2006 07:59:00 p.m.  
Blogger Mary P. said...

Haley: HA! Who???

Jen: Well, yes. I tried to work that into the post, some internal aside about it being better if both parties are consensually naked, but it just diluted the punch line, so I skipped it. ;-)

Granny: Yes, he did, for as long as I was looking at him, which is all that really matters. Good lad.

Kimmyk: It's possible, because you never know what they're going to decide to tell. As you probably know from experience, though, ask a child "what happened at school today" and the most common answer is "nothing". Sigh.

AndieD: Well, given that he's only three, I don't know that it's all that late. And the jury's out yet whether it's actually be learned just yet. Haley's "friend" up there, that's late!

5/16/2006 07:49:00 a.m.  
Blogger CINDY said...

THANKS, That explains on who is gentlemen and who is not. I wish several of the MEN that I face to face talk with, WOULD HAVE learned that Important Life Lesson long ago, but did not. UUUGGGG!!!

5/16/2006 11:08:00 a.m.  
Blogger AverageMom said...

That is possibly the most important lesson he will learn this year. If he can only remember it...

5/16/2006 05:07:00 p.m.  
Blogger mo-wo said...

Daycares should calculate some sort of courtesy tax. I think new parents benefit hugely from the propensity, and necessity, of child care providers to teach these sorts of vital lessons.

5/17/2006 12:05:00 a.m.  

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